The Lord placed this subject on my heart at the beginning of this week. I was wrestling with trusting. As a worship leader, I lead this amazing congregation into worship every single Sunday. I have to depend on the Lord to give me, give US, strength every week to do His will. From the outside people may see such a anointed woman full of big, radical faith. Although this is true I still struggle with trusting. I am STILL learning how to walk this out with the Lord.
There are a couple big mountains that I find myself staring at constantly. I don’t say a word, I am just jarred by how big they are. The way they tower over me. Have you been here before? Instead of looking at the awe of God, how powerful HE is, and how willing He is to do the miraculous, you just stand and stare at the situation. That is what this week has looked like for me.
I was drawn to Mark 9. There is a man who brought his son to Jesus in hopes that he could deliver him from demon possession. The man said something to Jesus that I have been ruminating on all week.
Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?”
“From childhood,” he answered. “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But IF YOU CAN do anything, take pity on us and help us.”
-Mark 9:21-22 NIV
When I read this, I realized that this is what a lot of my prayers have sounded like. “If you can, Lord.” I couldn’t even write this post yet, all I could do was meditate and reflect on recent moments where I have prayed “In Jesus name,” lead worship, or asked God to move these mountains and have doubted all at the same time. Doubt doesn’t just show up, it is rooted in something deeper. Doubt is just the result but the cause is always buried beneath the surface. The father had only seen his son struggle his entire life. No peace, no joy, no relief just torment. I am sure the father thought if the Lord isn’t who he says He is then who will be able to help my son? Like me, I am sure the father’s doubt was rooted in fear.
“If you can?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for the one who believes.
Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"
-Mark 9:23-24 NIV
How gentle and kind is the LORD! He did not condemn nor did His response make the man feel small. Instead His response empowered the man to be honest. He immediately turned to the Lord and said, “Help me through this unbelief.” As I read, I realized that instead of staring at the mountain I can go to the Lord and just be honest with Him. If I am struggling I can ask the Lord to help me to a place of FAITH. The enemy wants us focused on the wrong things. He would love for us to be discouraged to the point where we don’t open our mouths to speak. I have been there! I have been so overwhelmed where I don’t even know what to say to the Lord. But what this man taught me while reading was that I can come to God with my shaky faith and HE WILL lead me through it.
We ought to pray this more! “Help me overcome!” I have good news friend, HE WILL help you overcome!
"When Jesus saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the impure spirit. “You deaf and mute spirit,” he said, “I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.” -Mark 9:25
I honestly thought I skipped a verse because right after the father says help me, the Lord turns, and drives out the evil spirit. I asked the Lord, “Why didn’t you use that moment to respond to the Father and teach Him with words how to trust, how to believe?” I read verses 24 and 25 over and over again. It wasn’t until I was talking it through out to my husband where God placed the answer in my spirit. He said, “I did give Him the answer, read it again.” There it was, plain as day. The Father asks God to help him overcome his unbelief and then the Lord immediately turns to his son and heals him!
When we release the doubt and ask the Lord to intervene we give Him the opportunity to do the miraculous!! The very act of Jesus healing the son sparked the flame on the inside! The flame that uproots the fear that has been poisoning his unbelief.
If you are struggling with unbelief, ask the Lord to help! The Lord will step in, turn to your situation, and do what only He can! He doesn’t just do it because you asked, He does it to remind you that He is God and you can place your faith IN HIM!
Dear God,
Thank you for such a beautiful demonstration as to how gentle and kind you are. Lord I know that I have been struggling with some pretty big mountains lately. I have been focusing my attention on how great they are. But Lord, I pray that you would help me today! I pray that I would refocus my eyes on you. You are God! You are great and mighty. You say that anything is possible for the one who believes. God, I believe, but help me overcome the unbelief that I still harbor. I thank you right now for showing up. I thank you for igniting my faith today through this story. God I trust your capable hand. I trust that you know here I am going. I trust that you are already making ways for me. No matter how long I have been struggling with anxiety, worry, fear, distrust, or confusion. God, I will believe your word that says I am not given the spirit of fear, I don’t have to worry about anything, you hold my future, and that you know the plans you have for me! I rebuke the fear that comes up when I declare your word over my life. I uproot it in Jesus name! God, I am sorry for allowing the cares of this world to distort the way I see you. Forgive me Jesus. I believe you are who you say you are!
In Jesus Name, no fear!
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